A Weighty Matter....

I crack up every time I hear the commercial from Suzanne Sommers, " if you are a women, over 40 and fat, it is NOT your fault"

Don't know where she gets her knowledge, but I can assure you, there is not much truth to the statement above.

One of the main issues I have dealt with my whole adult life has been my weight. I can truthfully say, that it is no one else's fault that those pounds creep up on me, but my own.

There are so many different programs out there. Which one is the best? The one that works for you! I have found weight watchers to be the perfect program for me.

But the program only works, or any program only works if I remain consistant and self disciplined and live with moderation. It is a lifestyle, not a "diet", not a "I am going to eat right for the next 8 months because my 40th class reunion is coming up".

There is much in my heart that I still want to do in my lifetime. I want to be healthy and strong enough to accomplish all that the Lord has for me in the future and now. I am not asking for a "Barbie" figure, just a healthy one. That is my goal. To bring honor to the Lord and a testimony of His grace.

I wish my sin was not so evident for all the world to see, but it is. I repent, and go on and know that He is faithful to hear the cries of my heart and help me AGAIN to find victory.

The Lord's grace is there for me and for all of us who struggle in this area of our lives.

Psalms 62:5-6

My soul waits in silence for God only:
For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.

Hope is a wonderful gift. There are many hopes I carry within my heart. I again, bring them before the Lord and lay them before Him. It's the waiting in "silence" that is the hardest :}

A Trip Down Melancholic Lane....

As I was waiting to board a flight today, I was glancing out into the waiting area and saw a family with small children. They reminded me of our little family when we were raising our 3 little kiddies.

I wanted to step back in time, and redo it. Redo their childhood years and:

cuddle them more

worry less about the "clean" house and let them have fun

care less about what people thought

not trying to make them "perfect"

not trying myself to be the "perfect" parent

minister GRACE, abundant Grace and less legalism

There is so much I wish I could redo and not have let the moments pass without cherishing and appreciating each one. It seems like when the children are small, we are so caught up in the everyday things that need to be done. Laundry, dishes, meals, etc... I wish I would of taken the time to be and enjoy each moment with my kiddies...

I have often wondered why the Lord gives us children when we are young and selfish and immature and lack wisdom. I know one reason why we have them when we are young, because we are too tired when we are older to handle the demands of continuous action and questions.

I know the Lord redeems. I know He has covered all my mistakes and errors as a parent and sees my heart as I cry out before Him on behalf of each of my children. I know this, and yet, there is still a part of my heart that weeps over it. I wish I was tucking them in their cribs and bunks tonight with much laughter and kisses and hugs and reading and prayers. Jessica with her Teddy. Mike with Duke, and Laura with her monkey.

And The Wheels Lift Off......

Only when the wheels of the aircraft began to speed down the runway in Anchorage and lift off, did my heart feel a little sad. It was then, I realized that I had just left Alaska and the next touchdown would be far away from so many I loved. And yet, also taking me to ones I loved dearly too.

Waiting to get on my flight in Anchorage, was a dear friend of Jim's and mine, John Williams. We were on the same flight, headed to PDX. It was just an added blessing to be able to spend a few moments together before we boarded.

I had 3 seats again to myself. I lifted the arms of them and laid down. It was a nice smooth flight. I had some hours to begin to process my trip and just had such a grateful heart for the opportunity that had been mine. I fell asleep too :}

I am looking forward to a good rest tonight and day tomorrow, before I head back to work on Wednesday. I learned a long time ago that I am too old to fly back from Alaska and head back to work on the same day. I need time to process and recuperate. It sucks getting old..:}

I am looking forward to going back to work as an Alaskan/Horizon Employee with refreshed insight on how it feels on the other side of the counter. A smile, a kind word, goes a long way to a weary traveler.

I love my family. I am grateful for the investments made into my life at a young age, from my dad and mom. I have a heritage to pass on to my own children and their children.

Alaska: I will be back. Alaska Airlines: you are the best!

Grateful For His Grace

It was a beautiful day with a heat wave of 7 above zero. I loved spending time with my youngest daughter and we sure made the memories this weekend. She was my chauffeur, although I did venture out and drive her car to town and felt quite accomplished. I know I grew up with these kind of snowy icy roads, but when you have been away from them it is a little intimidating to tackle them again. But I did and I didn't even panic.

What a wonderful morning at Church On The Rock seeing so many people I love. To worship with a group of believers that have a part of my heart was a ministry. It was communion Sunday and so Dad, Gail, Laura and I got up together to share this special time together. The tears seeped from my eyelids as my dad prayed before we partook. Another memory for me to hold close within my heart.

So many cherished friends I saw today, ones that have played such an important part in my life. Many of them have invested deeply into my heart and have deposited much truth and grace through many years.

None of us are lone rangers. We need each other. We need encouragement, help, direction, insight, wisdom, grace, peace, and yes, correction and reproof. We are all on this journey of life together. The Lord uses us to minister to each other. May we not neglect these gifts He has placed in us to reach out and make a difference in each others life. His grace, working in us, to change us and use us!

Laura and I drove to Kenai. I was able to get on the first flight out to Anchorage. There were only 6 on board. I love the 20 minute flight. Spent the evening with my sista Debby and her hubby Bob and my sista Marie. There is NOTHING like being with family.

I love my family. My time with my dad is something I will always have to hold onto. I am so thankful for these last few days that the Lord gifted to me. I pray my daddy lives for another 10 years, and I will trust the Lord with His decision on when his time on earth is done.

Good night Alaska. You know you have my heart......

No Place More Beautiful....

I grew up here and come to visit as often as I can, and each time I still stand in amazement of the beauty that Homer holds. I can't imagine there being a more majestic place to be.

This morning I brought Laura to the doctor and she was diagnosed with bronchitis. So we stopped at the pharmacy and filled her up with all the drugs she needs for the next week. Made sure she got some good cough medicine that will let her sleep. We love codine :} She spent the day on the chair at Uncle Ken & Theresa's home watching movies, drinking Grampa's blueberry tea, water, napping and just resting.

I spent many hours at my dad and Gail's just relaxing and visiting and great conversations. My dad is full of knowledge and I loved listening to him tell me the history of the Jews and how scripture puts it all together with what is happening in our world today. It was fascinating listening to him. Makes me want to dig deeper into scripture! I am so grateful for these moments with my dad, that I will have to cherish always.

Got to spend a few moments with a dear friend I went to school with from 6th grade to 12th grade. I love the bond that we have in friendship and mostly the bond we have through Jesus, as we both have given our lives to serve Him and love Him with all our hearts. No matter where we leave off, we pick right back up when we get together. That is a cherished friendship.

Tomorrow it will be off to church and I will get to see so many people that I love. Lots of hugs! Then it will be off to Kenai again with Laura and I will wait for another standby flight to Anchorage. How did this time go so fast? There are so many I didn't get to see, but this season, this time, is for my dad and it has been special.

Oh Alaska....You Know You Have My Heart.....

I did get on the 615 flight last night! The photo above was taken from my seat. I sat in the back bench seat. It was a small plane! Had a great conversation with the two ladies I sat by.

Laura was there at the airport waiting for me. It was so wonderful to see my daughter. We drove to her little home and she made me a delicious dinner. We started to watch a movie but I was falling asleep. So off to bed we went. I slept for 12 hours.

I was able to see her office at the school she works for and the two wonderful ladies she works with. It always does a mother's heart good when people love your kids :}

We headed to Homer after we stopped at Subway for lunch. Thank you Auntie Ree for the coupons. It was sunny but cold and the roads were typical Alaskan winter roads. I counted 4 moose a long the way.

It was so wonderful to walk into my dad's home and see him standing there. He was folding laundry! I spent 4 hours with him and Gail (his wife) and then my brother Mark and his wife Isi and their son, Javan, brought out a wonderful stew dinner. It was a great evening. I love my dad.

There are so many emotions in my heart when I come home. So many memories. Memories from the past and memories to be made. Life is made up of all these memories. One thing I do know is, the Lord is faithful and always has been faithful and will remain faithful to the deepest cries of my heart.