Oops...it is not Christmas, wrong holiday...I should be singing "Happy Birthday" :} I am up savoring my last few moments of being 56 years old...YIKES, that sounds incredibly old. I can remember the day my mom turned 30 and I thought she was getting old. I was only 15 then, and a sophomore in high school.
Birthdays give you a time to stop and reflex upon one's life, dreams, visions, perspectives and priorities. But also this year, it has stopped me in my tracks to consider the "legacy" I will be leaving behind for those that follow. What am I leaving to my children and grandchildren and great grandchildren, besides the book I am taking forever to write about my childhood on the homestead in Alaska, and the grace of God that so incredibly worked in my heart and in the lives of my family.
The frailty of life has become so real to me these last few months, as death and birth have been a part of my surroundings. Life really is fleeting. It goes by so fast and have we made a difference? Have our lives counted for more than it being all about "us"?
I want to make a difference in the lives of the ones I love. A difference that would cause them to want to be more like Jesus and pursue Him with their whole hearts. Not a "Sunday School" religion. I want to leave a legacy of faithfulness and obedience. Not one of perfection, but one of realness and honesty. One who wasn't afraid to admit failure, repent, and get up and go on again, understanding the Lord's forgiveness.
Oh, I wish I could see down the family line for the next 50 years and see if the legacy I have left them, drew them to Jesus. But, I can't see that far...I can only see 2 generations down and my whole heart yearns for them to see Jesus and His incredible grace through my life.
I could conquer the world (whatever that means), be a billionaire (I promise Lord I would give lots away, if I won the lottery), lasso the moon (Jimmy Stewart), have lots of "things" and "possessions".... but the most important thing to me, is my family. Nothing else compares to them walking with the Lord. Nothing!
Justin, Jessica, Taylor, Tanner, Tristan, Mike, Laci, Laura, and all the future "grandkids" and future son-in-law, ... You are all my heart. The legacy I desire and will always yearn to pursue will be for you.... because you are a part of me.
My heart cries out to you Lord, to continue your good work in my heart to make me more like You, so I can leave the legacy my heart desires to those that come behind me.